What NOT to Put on Your Resume (Unless You Want to Stay Unemployed)

What NOT to Put on Your Resume (Unless You Want to Stay Unemployed)

Writing a resume can feel like assembling IKEA furniture—confusing, frustrating, and likely to end with you questioning your life choices. But sometimes, the biggest mistake isn’t what you leave out—it’s what you leave in.

If you’re wondering why your job applications are being ghosted, it might be time to check if you’ve accidentally turned your resume into a comedy special. Here are the top things NOT to include in your resume (unless you’re applying for the role of Office Clown).

1. Your 8th Grade Perfect Attendance Award

Yes, we’re proud of you for showing up to class every day in 2009. But unless the job requires Olympic-level consistency (like a time traveler or human clock), let’s leave childhood achievements where they belong—next to your Pokémon card collection.

✅ What to do instead: Highlight relevant skills and accomplishments from recent jobs or education.

2. An Objective Statement That Says… Nothing

❌ “I am seeking a challenging position where I can utilize my skills and grow professionally.”
Translation: “I am looking for a job. Any job.”

Hiring managers know why you’re applying—they don’t need a vague paragraph confirming it. Instead, give them a strong summary statement that explains what makes you a top candidate.

✅ What to do instead: Skip the fluff. Use a short, powerful headline like “Marketing Specialist with 5+ Years of Driving Brand Growth.”

3. Your Entire Life Story (We’re Not Making a Biopic Here)

If your resume is longer than War and Peace, it’s time to trim it down. No recruiter has time to read about your first lemonade stand, your summer lifeguarding gig, or how you “kind of” learned French on Duolingo.

✅ What to do instead: Keep it concise—1-2 pages MAX. Stick to the most relevant experience and skills.

4. A Selfie (No Matter How Good Your Hair Looks)

We know—you looked amazing in that beachside selfie. But unless you’re applying to be the next face of a shampoo commercial, a professional headshot is not required.

✅ What to do instead: Let your experience speak for itself. If the job requires a photo (like acting or modeling), use a separate, professional portfolio.

5. Obvious Lies That a Five-Second Google Search Will Expose

If you list “Fluent in Mandarin” but your interviewer greets you with nǐ hǎo and you panic, we have a problem. Same goes for inflating job titles (“CEO of Starbucks” when you were a barista) or claiming “10 years of experience” in a field that’s only existed for five.

✅ What to do instead: Be honest! If you’re still learning a skill, say “Proficient in progress” instead of flat-out lying.

6. Your Weird Hobbies (Sorry, Competitive Cheese Rolling Fans)

Hobbies are great, but unless they directly relate to the job, maybe leave them off your resume. Sure, your “extreme yo-yo skills” might be impressive, but unless you’re applying to work at a circus, it’s not helping your case.

✅ What to do instead: If it’s relevant (like graphic design, coding, or volunteering), include it. Otherwise, save it for the “fun facts” part of your interview.

7. References Available Upon Request (We Know.)

You don’t need to announce this—if they want references, they’ll ask. Just like you don’t text someone “I’ll reply soon” when you could just… reply.

✅ What to do instead: Use that space for something valuable—like showcasing a key skill or project.

Final Thought: Don’t Let Your Resume Be the Reason You’re Overlooked

Look, job searching is tough enough without your resume sabotaging you. If you’ve made any of these mistakes, don’t panic—we’ve all been there. The good news? CvsAndResumes AI is here to help you craft a modern, ATS-optimized resume that actually gets you hired.

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Skip the resume guesswork. Create or update yours now on our AI and apply with confidence.

🚀 You’ve got this!

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